You don’t have to have everything figured out right now.
Pause for just a moment. Inhale slowly. Exhale fully.
One deep breath won’t change your circumstances, but it can help calm your nervous system enough to take the next step. Sometimes that’s all you need—the next step, not the next month.
Drink some water.
Eat a snack.
Use the restroom.
These may sound obvious, but in the middle of a crisis, they’re often the first things we forget.
Your body is carrying stress in ways you may not even realize. Giving it a little fuel and hydration can help you think more clearly and stay present during long days at the hospital.
When someone asks, “What can I do?” it’s okay to let them.
Ask them to bring dinner.
Have them pick up a phone charger or a sweatshirt.
Let them sit with your child while you step away for a few minutes.
You don’t have to prove how strong you are by doing everything yourself. The people who care about you genuinely want to help—they just may not know how.
If your child’s care team says it’s okay, take a short walk.
Walk down the hallway.
Step outside for fresh air.
Sit in the cafeteria.
Even five minutes away from the constant sounds and activity of the hospital can help you reset before returning to your child’s bedside.
There is no right way to get through this.
Some days you’ll feel strong.
Other days you may cry in the parking garage, forget what someone just told you, or feel completely exhausted.
All of those responses are normal.
You are carrying something incredibly heavy.
Give yourself the same kindness and compassion you would offer another parent sitting beside you.
One More Thing